Madam Di soon divorced the Marquis of Huai'en and moved nearly everything out of the manor. Whether out of spite or indifference, the Marquis promptly set Concubine Wen back in her place.
Yi Qing didn't gossip about the messy details; from the outside it looked like everyone had gotten what they wanted — a tidy, mutual sort of victory. She kept holding the fort at her little clinic that no one visited, and Xiao Tian came along to keep her company.
Boredom drove her to prop up a rack and roast corn and sweet potatoes. The sweet, caramelly smell spread through the room, making mouths water.
"You know…" Yi Qing said, blowing on a hot bite as she peeled the sweet potato, "hot."
Xiao Tian quietly dragged the plate toward him and stripped the skin for her without a word.
She watched his deft hands and grinned. "When do you think Prince Zhen will finally leave?"
"Why ask?" Xiao Tian's face didn't move. He reached for a clean white porcelain bowl, dropped the peeled sweet potato into it, and handed her a spoon.
"It's not me asking—Zi Su asked me." Yi Qing scooped a spoonful, blew on it and offered it to him. "Zi Su is so sick of his pestering. If Prince Zhen doesn't go, she's thinking of leaving."
"Prince Zhen has been chasing Zi Su for me," Xiao Tian said.
"For you?" Yi Qing's eyes widened.
"He thinks Zi Su is your maid."
She snorted. "Which of us looks like the maid? Tell Prince Zhen to stop dreaming. Zi Su isn't someone he can have."
"He's a prince," Xiao Tian said.
"That doesn't change anything." Yi Qing bit into the sweet potato — it was tender, sugary, fragrant. "Here—try it."
She brought the spoon to his lips. For a moment he froze, his mind suddenly blank. She had already eaten from that spoon; he had seen it. Now she pushed it close to him.
"You still don't like me, huh?" Yi Qing teased when he didn't move. "I'll get you another spoon."
"No." He snapped it shut around the spoon before she could. Her smile faltered for the first time.
"Is it good?" she asked.
"Yes." He bowed his head, and for the briefest instant the rims of his ears flushed red.
He hadn't tasted the sweet potato at all. All he could think about was that she'd used that spoon — that she'd put it in her mouth.
Yi Qing licked her lips, her smile suddenly rich with meaning. "I thought you already knew about us."
"Don't talk nonsense." Xiao Tian's face hardened.
She ate slowly, savoring each bite, and then said, "We're both idle right now. Would you listen to an idea?"
"Say it." He did want to hear, though he refused to look interested.
She regarded him thoughtfully. "I'm still known as the widow of Xiao Jinghan. That name's brought me favors, but it closes doors too. Hard to remarry, isn't it?"
He hummed in agreement. She had a point.
"And you," she continued, "you get along well with the emperor but you don't care for official rank. You aren't aiming for promotion, right?"
Another short hum. He hadn't planned to return to office these past two years.
"How about we make do with each other?" she said, smiling brightly. "No formal titles. If someday you meet someone you love, I'll step aside."
Xiao Tian let out a bitter laugh. "You even planned an exit strategy for yourself."
She blinked, then sighed. "It's not easy being kind. I'm thinking of you, truly. In twenty years, I've only ever liked you. I don't think I'll ever like anyone else."
"Have you liked anyone before?" he asked, sharp.
Her face lit up. "Have? You mean—do you like me back?"
He turned his face away in a petulant, unhelpful way. "You only ever liked me. What's this about General Xiao?"
"That was just to have a child," she said plainly.
"And how did you get him on board?" Xiao Tian tried to sound casual, but his heart tightened all the same.
"I didn't persuade him." Her gaze dropped to the steam rising from the bowl. For a fleeting moment her defenses slackened. Maybe she had known all along and had simply refused to admit it; maybe she had no way out anymore. The emperor had legitimized her and Baozi, Duke Di and Madam Di knew who she was…her ties were everywhere. She was no longer the Yi Qing who could disappear for a year without anyone asking after her.
"Xiao Jinghan was unconscious," she said slowly, looking up at him. Each word landed like a hammer. "I took him in."
Xiao Tian's hands trembled almost beyond control. He had to clench his fists to steady himself.
"You didn't expect that, did you?" Yi Qing smiled, a strange, soft thing. "I don't know why, but I found him exhausted in the snow mountains…"
A small voice in his head warned him: he had been betrayed, ambushed, chased into the snow, wounded to avoid capture. Everyone who had been with him to protect him had died.
"I only wanted to warm him," Yi Qing said, eyes downcast. "He didn't want to be seen by strangers, so I didn't remove his mask. He was injured and poisoned. I dug an ice shelter and hid him there. We escaped capture. He had no awareness and clung to me. I acted on impulse…I've long wanted a child for myself…"
Xiao Tian's world tilted. The truth — blunt and unexpected — knocked the breath out of him. For a long beat he couldn't speak.
"I thought we would look after each other, comfort one another, without letting feelings get involved." She met his eyes. "But Xiao Tian, I know that you fell for me."
Her gaze was direct, sharp as if it could peel back his every pretense.
"I may not be deeply in love with him," Yi Qing went on. "But I wanted to try with you. So I'm going to be frank. I never loved Xiao Jinghan in that way. He and I—there's only Baozi. He is still the hero I respect. During that half year in the camp, I saw too much. Even as a civilian, I must honor a hero."
She leaned forward, quiet and sincere. "Admit it, Xiao Tian. You like me. There's nothing wrong with liking me."
Perhaps it was the sweetness of the potato or the warmth in the room that softened her, or maybe she was finally tired of pretending. Whatever it was, she spoke with a rare, unguarded honesty.
"If General Xiao were alive…" Xiao Tian asked, watching her, "would you stay with him?"
"No." Yi Qing's answer was immediate. "My predicament and his death happened at the same time. That's why things unfolded the way they did."
She couldn't hand her future over to Baozi as a gamble. Xiao Jinghan might be a hero, but that didn't mean he had impeccable private morals, or that he wasn't reckless, or that he wouldn't be a traditional, domineering man. How could she entrust her life to a man she barely knew just because of the name he wore?