"Your heart is beating so fast. Why?"
Her heart, which had already been pounding, now seemed on the verge of leaping out of her throat.
Her body tensed up as well, but she still stubbornly retorted, "You're mistaken. This is just my normal heart rate."
Lu Yan didn't expose her lie. Instead, he rubbed his head against her shoulder and nestled closer into her embrace. "Miaomiao, my head hurts so much."
His voice was deep and hoarse, with a hint of allure. "Don't you feel sorry for me, huh?"
Ning Anmiao turned her head away, trying hard not to be deceived by his feigned appearance. "You brought this upon yourself. I won't feel sorry for you."
Lu Yan's head was very close. She heard his deep voice whispering in her ear, "I drank so much because of you, Miaomiao."
Lu Yan rested his chin in the crook of her neck. His breath gently caressed her cheek, the warmth especially scorching. "I missed you so much that I just kept drinking without realizing it."
He deliberately slowed down his tone. His lazy and casual voice made her ears tingle, and Ning Anmiao's earlobes quickly turned red.
She frowned slightly. "What does this have to do with me?"
Lu Yan said, "Since the day we quarreled, I've reflected for a long time. I know I was wrong before. I didn't face our relationship as positively and optimistically as you did."
At this moment, he was extremely clear - headed. He still explained his feelings to Ning Anmiao in his own way. "I always thought I could calmly handle anything, including our relationship."
"But the truth proved I was wrong. The moment I agreed to the divorce, my first thought was whether there was still a chance to regret it."
Ning Anmiao's heart skipped a beat. Her hand hanging by her side unconsciously tightened, and she even breathed more softly.
She recalled that night. Lu Yan was indeed different. He, who always had good self - control, actually smoked in the bedroom.
"I was too arrogant, thinking I could control everything. I seriously underestimated the importance of this relationship to me."
"When I realized I might never have any connection with you for the rest of my life, everything in my world seemed to lose its meaning."
Speaking of this, he let out a deep sigh. "Miaomiao, I've never cared so much about what I might lose, except - "
He paused for a moment, and the last few words were especially slow. "Except losing you."
At this moment, a flood of emotions suddenly welled up in her heart. Those delicate and tender feelings of love rushed back into her body like a tide.
Her throat trembled a little. She bit her lip. "But there's no medicine for regret in this world."
Even if Lu Yan said a million sweet words now, the pain and grievances from that time were still real.
She couldn't let go, and she couldn't make peace with it.
The relationship between her and Lu Yan was just too complicated.
She couldn't even sort out her feelings for him. Was it the passion of her youth or the attachment formed over time?
But she was sure that the pain Lu Yan had brought her couldn't fade away easily.
Just at the sight of his face, she would recall those three years when she was like a clown, living a life like a game of house.
Just thinking about it made her shiver all over.
"Yeah, I know."
Lu Yan tried his best to control his emotions, afraid of scaring her. "So I've been thinking about how to minimize the harm I've caused you."
Ning Anmiao had been stubborn, but when she heard him say "harm", her eyes immediately turned red. She pouted. "It's too late now. It can't be fixed."
There was a hint of a sob in her voice. Her shoulders trembled slightly with her emotions, and her clenched fist tightened even more.
Seeing that her emotions were about to get out of control, Lu Yan paused for a moment and couldn't help but let out a soft laugh. He lifted the back of his hand that wasn't being injected and gently ruffled her hair.
"Yeah, I know."
"I'm sorry, Miaomiao."
His calm and composed voice somehow made people feel at ease. Ning Anmiao felt even more aggrieved. She grabbed the clothes on his chest with both hands and began to sob.
"I felt that in those three years, I was just playing a game of house alone. And you didn't play the role of a 'husband' well. Instead, you just stood there and watched coldly, undermining me."
She took a deep breath, trying to make herself speak more coherently. "Actually, I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid of giving birth, I'm not afraid of falling out with my family, and I don't care about your mom's sarcasm. But..."
She was never a coward.
"But you shouldn't have had to face all these alone."
Lu Yan softly and slowly interrupted what she was about to say. He placed his big hand on her back and gently patted it to soothe her.
"I didn't understand before, but I do now, Miaomiao."
"I won't let you face things alone from now on."
...
After getting the IV drip and on the way back in the taxi, Ning Anmiao still couldn't stop sobbing. Her little face and nose were all red and swollen from crying.
The little girl was crying so hard that even the taxi driver couldn't help but peek at them through the rear - view mirror from time to time.
Seeing her little face all wrinkled up in grievance, Lu Yan couldn't help but let out a soft laugh. He pinched her nose. "Miaomiao, it's me who's sick."
He said seriously, "If you keep crying like this, people will think I've beaten you up, and that's why we're both in the hospital."
Hearing this, Ning Anmiao noticed the suspicious look of the driver. She hurriedly retorted, "What beating? We're not even husband and wife."
"Yeah, not husband and wife. It's just the bickering between lovers." Lu Yan said calmly, but there was a hint of teasing in his words.
Ning Anmiao's face turned red with anxiety. She wanted to defend herself, but seeing the increasingly strange look of the driver, she chose to keep quiet.
The more she said, the more mistakes she might make.
Seeing that she finally sat quietly beside him, Lu Yan finally relaxed his brows, with a faint smile in his eyes.
When they got home, Ning Anmiao stopped crying, but for a moment, she didn't know where to go.
It was so late. Going back would surely disturb Yanyan. But staying at Lu Yan's place wasn't very appropriate either.
She hesitated in front of Lu Yan's door.
Seeing this, Lu Yan more or less guessed what was on her mind. His steady voice was assertive. "I'm a bit hungry. Go home and cook me a bowl of porridge."
Ning Anmiao was taken aback for a moment and then replied dryly, "Oh, okay."
This way, it seemed she had a reason to enter the house.
They entered the house one after another. Ning Anmiao changed her shoes at the door and then turned to ask him, "What kind of porridge do you want?"
"Plain rice porridge will do. Something light." Lu Yan nodded slightly, with a smile on his lips.